In the Beginning

Interns starts tomorrow. For anyone morbidly curious enough to wonder what Interns is, it's a nine month long discipleship program for eighteen to thirty year olds. There's classes three days a week, conferences and the works. I don't know much about it seeing as I've never done it. However tomorrow we are going to a cabin until Friday to get to know each other. To be honest I'm not as excited as I keep telling people I am. While yes it is something new, it's not new to be doing something new so it's not exciting. It's just like starting another year of school and a new school. I've been to eleven schools, so this is nothing new. However I'm sure most of the people in Interns have been to three or four schools, five if they really have moved around, and one hasn't been in school since first grade, so this is a 'new and exciting' thing. For me it's just 'meh, it's new. Big deal.' And also as shallow as this sounds, I'm scared I'm not going to fit in. That the other girls are going to instantly mesh, and I'm going to be on the outside looking in, and that if they do try to include me, that it'll be out of pity for the 'washed out little kid' then them actually wanting to get to know me.

Anyway, I'll try and let you's know how it goes as the year progresses. And on Saturday after I get back. I'll try, no absolute promises though.
Sorry about the dely'd update.
Aurum.

10 minute post

Alright I only have ten minutes to type. Less than that really since I have to be somewhere at 2:30 and it's now 2:19. Granted, it only takes two minutes to get there, but that's besides the point. Anyway, I am really sorry about not posting in, well, forever but every time I went to blog I realized I had nothing to blog about, or I hadn't finished processing it yet myself so I couldn't post it, and than just forgot about it. But now, now I have stuff to post about. I just may not get through it all right now.
First it's April, which means this month and next month are our last two full months of school, and then only a half a month. Because exams take two weeks, although I only have an English exam to take. In some ways that is really exciting. I always love the end of school when it warms up (this year has missed that memo though) and you can wear shorts and tank tops again, it just feels like summer. I love that feeling. However on the other hand its really scary because it is our last time of reaching the end of a school year, and this time there is a Grad ceremony to add to it, something that hasn't been in our other years of schooling. And next year we aren't coming back. It's really really scary when you think about it.

I'm hoping to be accepted into the InterMenno program next year. It's an exchange program where you go live in Germany, Switzerland, or the Netherlands for a year and work there, learning their language and culter and such. However they have sent out the letters/e-mails to everyone else, and I seem to be the only one who hasn't gotten any. If I don't get accepted I'm planning on going to UFV (University of the Fraiser Valley) next year and get my BA in English, as well as work full time and take dance class. Ballet and Jazz once again.

Alright I decided I might make this a longer than ten minute post, mainly because I want to proof read it (my friends would be proud) and I have so much more to post that I don't want to just end it, so I will just cut it off when I have to go, save it, and then come back to it after play rehearsals (backstage crew). Or if I don't have enough time, after my small group. Which reminds me I have print off/re-type some of my poems to bring there, expessually one I wrote last week on my missions trip, which I will type about when I get back from rehearsals cause I gotta go. Be back before you finish reading this. Haha.

So, it's been about two weeks since I started this post... I was going to talk about my missions trip though, which will have to be in another post. I'm just drooping this off so that I don't forget about it, and hopefully on Sunday (it's Friday night now) I can write about my missions trip. Someone bug me about it until I post please.

Aurum.

'Twas the Night Before.... (what times is this now?)

ACK! I haven't posted all year....... (corny, I know)

Alright so Christmas has come and gone, New Years has come and gone, and all that's left is to go back to school (ahhh!) and go have the family Christmas get together, in January, well AFTER Christmas. But that's just because this way people could go to other family gatherings and thus creating less confusion.

Anyway, onto important stuff. For Christmas I got my dad a book called Pierced. It's really a comic book. Actually a book filled with Zit's comics, specifically the ones that have Pierce in them. I think he liked it. I got a CAMERA!!!!! It's pink, and silver. I also got a ballerina calender, a $50 gift certificate to Coles, bath stuff, a shirt, slippers (one says good morning, and the other says good night)and a fridge magnet that says "I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it" I loved what I got.

From the gift certificate I got two books and a bookmark. I still have money left on it too. The books I got were "The Hunger Games" by Suzanne Collins, and "Need" by Carrie Jones.

"The Hunger Games" has become my new favorite book. It's in the future but the most futuristic gadget in there is a hover craft, the rest of it is basically normal stuff we have, and even a little less (no cell phones, or IPods, that kind of thing), and North America has been reduced to one country called Panem, which is one city called Capitol (ironically, it's the the capitol of Panem) that is surrounded by twelve districts, every year one teenaged girl, and one teenaged guy is forced to go to the capital to participate in the hunger games, a televised fight to the death. It's mandatory to watch. The winner is the last person left alive.

"Need" is basically "Twilight" without the vampires, and all the drama, but with Pixie's and other were-animals besides werewolves. It was good.

Today we went skating. I spent half of it with one of those things that help you skate. For the record yes I can skate, however the kid I was babysitting can't. So she was with the skate-help, and she still wouldn't skate, so I pushed her around for about half the time. For the rest of it, my dad pushed her and I just skated around. It was so much fun. I want to go skating again soon. An odd statement I'm sure from someone who dislikes cold and such, but oh well.

Anyway I'm off. Talk to you all later.

Aurum.

So it snowed.... thankfully it didn't stick

So it finally and unfortunately snowed yesterday. At some time. I don't think I was outside when it did so. However we now have winteresc weather. Minus sixteen windchill (it's nothing honest), big wind, if it had 'rained' again today it would have been snow. To snow I say "Bah Humbug!" Unless it is Christmas Eve. Then it can snow. It can snow a lot on Christmas Eve, and say on Christmas Day, and then melt on Boxing Day and stay away until next Christmas Eve. Never gonna happen, I know.

Friday was the school Christmas Banquet. Theme: Fairy Tails. Entertainment: range from boring to absolutely pure brilliance. Sad part: The last school Christmas Banquet I will be attending. However the MC's were brilliant, the jazz band that played while we ate was a little slow and their songs all sounded the same, but whatever, and the last act was the best. Four guys, two in grade twelve two in grade eleven lip singing and dancing to Backstreet Boys 'I Want It That Way.' I nearly died of laughter. The decorations were brilliant too, with a fake castle front, thrones, love potions, 'poison,' my favorite the Prince Charming Potion, and so much more. After words we (the girls I hang out with) all went to one of our friends house and watched Thumbelina (which I fell asleep in...) and the Princess Swan (which I had been woken up for because another friend had come over so I had to move) and I stayed awake for it.

I finally got shoes for my Jazz class too, so I no longer have to wear my ballet slippers for it. However, they were sixty-three bucks (after tax) and that was at ten percent off. They is going to last me a while.

We also had our youth Christmas party, in which we had a gift exchange. The gift I brought was a large candy cane and a singing reindeer. The gift I got was the 'Are You Smarter then a Fifth Grader' board game. However at our youth we have a strange (and silly) tradition of rolling the dice. And depending on what you rolled you could do something. This year it was three, fives, nines and doubles. If you rolled one of those you had the option of trading your gift with anyone else's. I never rolled one of them, except when I still had my board game and I didn't want to trade it. But someone else did, and took the board game from me. However I got new headphones and hot chocolate. I was happy with that. But no. Someone had to take that and give me a mug. Fine. It would be nice to have a new mug that was just mine, and not my dad's too. But goodness no. Someone took that and gave me a can of root beer and a Timmies card (for those Americans and other countries and that don't know what Timmies is, Timmies is Tim Hortons, which is better then Starbucks). No one traded my for that. So I got root beer and a Timmies card. I drank the root beer, and bought me and my dad a medium candy cane hot chocolate with the card.

Anyway I am thinking of going to bed early, so night.

Aurum.

It's begining to look a lot like Christmas.

Ya right. It's not even snowing here. December is hour's away from starting and it hasn't even snowed once (not that that is a bad thing or anything, it just doesn't look Christmas-sy)

Of course though, I can't go through any happy season without getting it ruined by someone. Namely mother figure one. She is still steaming mad because I didn't have my social insurance number. I actually looked for it. I really did, and she was freakin yelling at me because I couldn't find it. And then she had to go on and try to make me feel guilty about not visiting her over the last few summers, or Christmas's. And then she goes on about last Easter when she showed up a few day's earlier then planned and so I went to a family get together without her (I tried to let them let her come, but she doesn't mix well with people).

She wanted me to pay for me to go visit her this Christmas with an 'if-I-can' insurance that she'll pay me back. Out of my missions fund! I'm sorry, but no. And she wouldn't let up either. Every few seconds she would continue on. Once again telling me "Your seventeen girl, stop thinking about yourself", oh how I wanted to tell her the same thing. Or she told me for the millionth time since I came into existence "I am dead inside because of you."

And then she wonders why I don't visit.

I just can't take it anymore. I cannot handle her mood swings, or the fact that my life MUST revolve around her, or her screaming (she doesn't yell, she screams), or the guilt trips, everything. I can't handle it anymore.

Every time she gets angry like this she always says "How would you like it if I just stopped calling, or hung up whenever you called (she doesn't have caller ID)? Huh? How would you like that girl?" (No she does not call me by my name when she is this mad). And I almost told her to go ahead.

Do you know how sad that is? When a person doesn't care anymore if there parent stops talking to them or not?

Merry Christmas. Right.
Aurum.

Sometimes it would be nice to just disappear.

Well, today started out alright. Well actually it started out last night. My manager kicked me out at eleven (I didn't actually get out till five after, but whatever) and told someone else to do my cleaning so I would get off on time (however there was only the washrooms left as it was so slow) and that made me very happy. And then on the way home I realized the radio station I listen to was playing Christmas music, and they are playing nothing but that until after Christmas (yess!!!) That was last night. This morning was good even though I had to get up at six. I didn't talk to much on the way to school, I did devotionals, and even though I don't think I did so hot on it, it was still fine.

First class we had to recite a poem, which I did quite well (I screwed up on one line, but it was like one word different so who cares?) My next class was a spare that I read in. My friends sat with me at lunch instead of going downstairs. The tree in the lounge looks good, despite what everyone says (some say it looks terrible, but we all have agreed that it looks like an over grown Charlie Brown tree). After lunch was physc where we finished a movie, and then talked. Some spider landed on my desk and started jumping. It freaked me out. And in acting we worked on our monologues. All in all it was a great day. I stayed after school to get a ride the the UGM (Union Gospel Mission) with my Missions class, and talked with some friends while we waited.

While we were at the UGM how tired I was started kicking in as I started getting irritated at little things, but then after we were done singing I was mopping and tipped the mop bucked over by accident, and for some reason that just brightened up the mood. Some guy even told me to go eat and he'd clean up the mess for me (I asked twice if he was sure and then thanked him). While I was eating I was talking to this one guy who was really cool.

Of course the day took a down turn when I called to talk to my mom. She got mad that I hadn't looked for my social insurance number like I asked, so she could put in on some form of hers. And she freaked out at me, her boyfriend was freaking out without being on the phone and I could hear everything he was saying. I'm sorry but I don't appreciate being called stupid and an idiot. I almost hung up on her. She didn't even sound happy that I made the honour role for the first time since fourth grade, which was something she always freaked out over that I wasn't getting on it. Of course my Dad isn't here so I couldn't give him the phone (she always freaks out when he isn't there) because he is doing security for a church thing. That just dropped me off of my good-day high.

Sorry I ranted.

Aurum.

EAGLES ROCK!

Alright, short post.

I just got back from a school volleyball game (to be specific, the very hot senior boys Fraser Valley Championship volleyball game). And boy was it intense. I was there with two friends, and I nearly broke my necklace from twisting it around my fingers because I was so nervous.

So we lost the first match. Fine, just as long as the other team doesn't win two more.

Then the next match, they had twenty-four, we had twenty-two I think, and then suddenly we had twenty-three, then twenty-four, and then twenty-five (and because you have to win by two) we then had twenty-six!!!!!!!! We won that one!

Match three we basically creamed them in the next game. It wasn't intense until the very end where the other team kept getting points, buy still far enough behind. And then we won!!!!

And finally the last match! We would get a point, they would get a point, we would get one, they would get one and so on and so on until about eight points each, and then we soared we eventually were ahead by ten points (more then once actually). The final tally for that one was twenty-five for us, fourteen for them!!!!!!!!!

WE WON!!!!!!!

And seeing as last year we lost every game to this team except for the Provincials (the only game that really mattered) it was just that much sweeter! We're onto the provincials again!!!!!!!!

Oh, and their was this group of guys from grade twelve all dressed up in old uniforms, or blue trash bag capes, or one guy wore an eagle mask (and the sports rep dressed up as an eagle) as well as painting their faces blue and gold (school colours!), banging empty plastic compost buckets, and large water jugs leading us in cheers.

It was a great game.

Aurum.